Child Therapy | Dr. Mary Lindahl, PhD

Therapy for Children & Teen

“A person’s a person, no matter how small.””

-Dr. Seuss

I am experienced working with children, teens, and families in various settings. I’m passionate about child advocacy and have published and consulted in these areas. I have experience and expertise working with these issues:

Anxiety and panic
Depression and sadness
School-related problems
Grief and loss
Abuse Issues
Trauma and post-traumatic stress
Parent-child conflict
Parental divorce and custody issues
Reunification Therapy
Serious medical illness

Anxiety and panic

     Anxiety disorders, including generalized anxiety, panic disorder, social anxiety, and various phobias, are quite common in children and teens. These disorders are characterized by excessive worry, behavior changes, bodily symptoms, and/or sleep and appetite changes. Often your child will try to cope by avoiding the situations, places, or people where the anxiety attack has occurred. However, this usually serves to make the problem worse.
     Anxiety disorders are caused by a combination of biological predispositions, stress, and difficult life experiences. Successful treatments are available, including adult reassurance and support, and cognitive behavioral techniques (CBT) designed to eliminate ineffective thinking patterns.
     At times, I have accompanied the child and parent I am working with to the place where the stressor occurred for gradual exposure and desensitization to the feared situation.
     Along with individual therapeutic sessions, there are workbooks and videos I can suggest to you. Support groups are available locally and on the internet for parents and caregivers, as well as many excellent written resources.

Grief and depression

School-related problems, learning and special needs

Some important issues students often encounter are learning problems and special needs, peer relationships, social anxiety, and bullying.
     The federal government has developed a large number of resources to help children with learning problems or other special needs. Schools have resources to evaluate the problem and can offer services targeted to your student’s individual issues. As the therapist, I may suggest a referral for further testing; this can give us a more specific understanding of cognitive abilities, learning style and/ or disability, and psychological functioning. The testing psychologist writes a thorough report with recommendations for the parents and the school. The school can then develop an individualized education plan (IEP) for your child.
     Therapy can help if your child is anxious about peer relationships, school performance, or other concerns. Schools usually have school counselors who can meet with her or him to help, as well as small groups to teach social skills.
     Unfortunately bullying is still a major problem in schools and our society at large, and it can do long-term damage to its victims. Many children are afraid or ashamed to admit this is happening, so it is important to encourage your child to confide in you. It is heartbreaking and infuriating to learn that your child is being bullied. Parents as well as outside professionals (for example the therapist, law enforcement, child advocates, and attorneys) can intervene and insist that the bullying stop. All 50 states have anti-bullying laws, but sometimes schools can be unresponsive, so you may have to insist that they take your child’s situation seriously. If things do not improve, sometimes it is best to consider changing your child’s school.

Abuse issues and trauma

As a psychologist, I am a mandated reporter and thus obligated to report any suspected abuse or neglect of a child. Our ethical and legal guidelines as well as those of child protective services require an immediate referral and do not allow us to investigate the validity of an allegation before reporting.
Physical, sexual and emotional abuse as well as neglect are very damaging to children and often require extensive therapy to ameliorate symptoms and promote long-term healing. Often,these children have a disrupted family situation. Hopefully, they are involved with child protection or the legal system and may have additional professionals helping them in those areas. When your child has had a traumatic experience, therapy can be very helpful in their recovery.
There are many resources for family members also, such as books, support groups, and non-profit organizations.

Parental divorce, custody issues, and reunification therapy

Children can usually adjust successfully to a parental divorce unless their parents become involved in a custody dispute; this can inflict long-term damage on children who are caught between the two parents.
     Sometimes these disputes are fought out in court over many years,costing thousands of dollars and leaving years of bitterness. There are many available resources, including attorneys and psychologists who offer mediation, and professionals who serve as parent coordinators.
     Working with these children in therapy can be challenging for therapists, who can also get caught between the two parents. I have been working in reunification therapy with families for many years, and it has recently become a recognized specialty area.
     These cases involve children who are estranged from a parent, even to the point of refusing to see them. Often the referrals come from the parents’ attorneys or a judge who orders reunification therapy for the reluctant child. These are among the most difficult cases a psychologist can take on.
     Some cases of estrangement involve a child who appears to have a valid reason for his or her reluctance, such as in cases of prior abuse. However, the majority of cases involve families entrenched in bitter custody disputes. Often the estranged parents accuse each other of abusing the child or fabricating allegations of abuse. Especially in ambiguous sexual abuse allegation cases, it is often impossible for the court or the professionals to make any accurate assessment of the validity of these allegations. The ultimate result can be tragic: a child who in fact has been abused and is not believed, a child who in fact has not been abused, but has come to believe she/he has been, and /or a child and professionals who have no idea what the reality is. Working with these children is often difficult because he or she may be confused, angry, opposed to reunification, or frightened of the estranged parent.
     The other parent may be adamantly opposed to reunification, while the child may want to see his or her other parent. In the end, unfortunately, the therapist and/or court may reluctantly decide it is not in the child’s best interest to continue the process.

Serious medical illness

Children who are seriously ill are subjected to many doctors, intrusive and painful medical procedures, and face the possibility of dying. Both the parents and the child need extensive support. This support is best obtained from specialists in this area, often social workers or psychologists in a medical center. These centers are skilled in working with sick and dying children and their parents and often have teams of professionals in that setting as well as a list of referrals to therapists and support in the community.

The therapy

Children are often more comfortable dealing with problems while they’re playing. They naturally express themselves in play, which can help them understand their feelings, deal with difficult emotions, develop problem-solving skills, and heal from challenging situations. Therefore, my office is filled with games, dolls, action figures, and art supplies, as well as lentils and sand for sensory play, a calm and relaxing activity for children of all ages. I work closely with parents to help them understand and address their child’s feelings and behaviors, including meeting with them alone as well as together with their child.